Moving on...

Okay, I've managed to archive all my posts (published and otherwise) from blogspot + pitas, and am moving out from here to my new domain at http://eitoile.com/.

The site is going to be empty for a while, while I slowly play around with HTML, CSS and other random bits. My blog will be at http://eitoile.com/blog - I've installed wordpress, so the blog bit is more or less good to go, if one forgives the unexciting layout/theme.

I'm not sure I'll include my previous in_flux on the blog, but may do so, depending on my mood. In the meanwhile, I just have loads of tagging and labelling to do for my archived in_flux posts anyway, which was the main reason I wanted to move to wordpress really.

Thanks for watching dear friends. Please switch channels to resume the programme...

Inching forward...

The Boy is away this weekend, and so I seized the opportunity to be productive - or so I thought!

>> I did manage to meet up with cousin J and bring her to Gazette to try their juicy and rich hot foie gras, finally!
- The Boy and I had brought her there to try it on New Year's Eve but they had a special NYE's set menu which excluded the foie gras. And this time, when we got there, it wasn't on the menu either.. I was really distressed and almost felt like crying - after all that effort to trudge all the way to the arsehole of London!! But I asked one of the lovely (and good looking!) waiters if we could have the hot foie gras with apples... the one that's usually on the menu - I had seen it several times when I came in 2008... he checked with the chef and said, okay, they can serve that. Hurrah - joy was I! We had the off-menu hot grilled foie gras with apples and chestnut (£9) as starter, and a calamari risotto (£12.50) for main, which was really lovely and creamy, and I was completely stuffed by the end of the meal.


>> And I also managed to visit The European Bookshop to get a couple of French vocabulary books that I had been meaning to get.
- This Friday, the Boy told MM, our friend and colleague at work, that I'm speaking french about half the time recently (true) and speak it quite well (very sweet of him, very untrue). In fact,
I have been heroically trying to speak loads of French lately, and have been getting really frustrated by my feeling of impotence due to my limited vocabulary. I feel handicapped - having to constantly pause in the midst of a laboriously constructed sentence to ask: "so how do you say [faint, etc.] in french?" It's difficult to be theatrical, like I so often like to be (mock-theatrical at least), when one has to interrupt oneself and consult the Boy on vocabulary. And I'm bored of using "Ca c'est une tragedie!" (this is a tragedie!) whenever I am cross/upset/annoyed by anything - e.g. The bus is late - this is a tragedie! I don't like this fish - this is a tragedie! - you get the picture. So I am quite eager indeed to expand my vocabulary!

>> However, I haven't managed to make any progress on my new website, despite the domain name registration, boo!
- My petite inner geek has been stumped by the simplest of coding - I am unable to save my html into a form readable by the internet web language powers-that-be. O woe is me! I am pretty depressed by my incompetence... rather shocked by how quickly skills that I once had, however rudimentary, have completely disappeared. Clearly, this coding stuff is not like riding a bike at all!

>> And I haven't cleared my room, learn any DSLR stuff, met up with my friends (as was my grand plan when I encouraged the Boy to go off to Paris on his own for a weekend with the boys)...
- so I'm a little bit disappointed with my (lack of) productivity. It's the new year, I should be making tonnes of progress while I'm all fired up!!

But tomorrow is another day... well actually... tomorrow (Sunday) is here, since it's already 2.45am now. It's funny, how I get completely unstructured in my sleeping pattern the moment I lose a framework that encourages regularity (work, the Boy) - I'm a total night owl batchelorette!

To bed, to bed! there's a knocking at the gate

My inner geek

Hurray!! Thanks to Mak, I finally managed to find a web host (dreamhost) that I liked and finally registered a domain and signed up for 10 years (bulk discount dude...)!

I'm pretty excited to be learning new things. I remember the first time I ever hosted a website at yahoo geocities and host.sk in 2001 (the website is dead and gone, and I've lost everything on those sites), and the first time I learnt to code HTML from my then boyfriend. Then later, experimenting with CSS when I moved over to pitas.com. Since I've moved here to blogspot in 2004, I've completely stopped any independent coding. So now I'm really excited to stretch my programming tiny muscles a little bit, and get up to speed on more updated (but not the latest) web technology, language, toys. Have dug up a little HTML 4 guide, list of CSS properties, and currently shopping around for a permanent FTP client... I can't wait to get started! :)

Mapping out 2009

Okay... projects large and small for this year with target dates and/or measurable milestones for success/failure audit purposes:

Micro projects:
- Grow my nails (again!), deadline: Q1 2009
- Tidy my room and recycle/donate stuff, deadline: Q2 2009
- Start drawing up a list of things I want to do before I die (v.26), deadline: Q2 2009

Ongoing projects:
- Register a domain name and move to a new website, deadline: Q2 2009
- Register for a online trading account (ISA) and start making investments, deadline: Q1 2009
- Learn to use my DSLR, target: learn a different function/aspect every month and apply it by taking at least one photo each month which involves experimenting with at least one control/aspect
- Get Rescue Diver certification from PADI, deadline: Q4 2009
- Achieve 100 michelin stars, deadline: Q4 2009

Major projects:
- Either: change job, Or: quit job and go travelling, deadline: Q3 2009
- Project C

Other considerations:
- Buying property? (depends on job)
- Explore options to pursue a path that allows me to directly make a tangible positive impact on world

I may add to this list and/or amend it as necessary.

Good night world, and HELLO 2009... here I come!! x

Looking back: 2008

I didn't draw up a list of objectives for 2008 at the beginning of last year, so I can't actually compare my year against a set of benchmarks. In fact, my blogging was sporadic at best, and I didn't even post my usual summary of the year for 2007, although I have the key bullet points saved in draft form, which I may, very belatedly, post up some time this year.

Ten Eight high/low lights of the year:

- Diving in Egypt (and getting certified AOWD)! Then diving some more in Phuket! :)

- Cycle/travelled along the Karakoram Highway, the highest paved international road in the world, via Khunjerab Pass, the highest paved border crossing in the world. although, to be fair, we did less cycling and mostly bussing and suzuki-ing etc.

- 桃花运 (tao2 hua1 yun4/ "peach blossom luck") and learning to walk away

- Credit Crunch 2008 series: How many ways can the cookie crumble?

- Breaking a seven-year boyfriend drought and letting someone in

- Starting a wonderful gastronomic adventure journey with the Boy, and ate at: Yauatcha, L'Escagrgot, Nobu, (Arbutus), Gordon Ramsey (Royal Hospital), Maison de Bricourt (Roellinger, before he shut it down), Senderens, La Table de Robuchon, Club Gascon, Petit Nice Passedat, Peron, Fat Duck, Waterside Inn, L'Amphitryon, Hakkasan in the space of six short michelin-starred months. _{(and the Boy got a 5C membership from Relais & Chateaux!)}

- Meeting his parents in August and at Christmas and being included in their family travel book! (the Boy's family compete to see who travels to more countries and his dad added me to the family book/competition! - I'm (34) ahead of his bro and mom (33) and just below his sis (35), with his dad at No.2 and him leading the game at 50 countries

- Introducing the Boy to my parents and having a surprisingly stress-free encounter, with my dad apparently accepting him. - My dad even wanted to hug the Boy at the airport when we were leaving! :O

All in all, it was a disastrous year for the markets. The year started out badly for me work-wise, which improved then deteriorated. But my personal life really blossomed and for that I am happy. I hope 2009 brings many more happy and happier days.

Tu m'aimes?

I love how the Boy indulges me.

To say I am a messy girl would be a gross understatement of mariana-trench depth. An ex-housemate regularly describes my room as a blackhole, and my room at its best (read: worst) would quite easily fit into BBC's featured chaotic work spaces. The afore-mentioned ex-housemate has always said that the reason I've been single for so many years is because my room is a mess, and that it would scare any potential boy away.

So, my poor darling Boy, who lives with me, often despairs at the state of my room, and would periodically throw his hands up: "Ma cherie, you're such a mess, your room is such a mess..."

My response is to give him a flat stare, pull out a pouty lower lip, and ask him: "Tu m'aimes?" (You love me?)

And he is trapped (yay!) - and I can see from his eyes that he sees through my not-very-subtle trap at once, but still, he responds immediately: "Oui, bien sur je t'aimes!" (Yes, of course I love you!) and pulls me into his arms.

I tell him there is a Chinese saying "爱屋及乌" (Ai4 wu1 ji2 wu1) which means "love the house and the crow on the house", so if he loves me, he has to accept me as I am, flaws and all. Everyone has flaws after all, just that some are more flawed than others... heh heh heh... >:)

My cousin laughed when I pulled the "Tu m'aimes?" stunt in front of her. She thinks I'm being very aggressive. I think I'm just cheeky.

And since the first time I pulled my "Tu m'aimes?" pouty face, the Boy's response has cheekily and teasingly progressively evolved from impassioned exclamation ("Oui, bien sur je t'aimes!"), to gentle reassurance ("Oui, je t'aime ma cherie"), to reluctant admission ("Ouais... je t'aimes.."), to a begrudging barely-there acknowledgement ("Ouais..")... and I pull a longer pouty face and throw mock sniffles into the bag for dramatic effect... so it's all fun and games with the Boy.

He's the sweetest, darlingest boy most of the time, and I really appreciate it, and I am going to make an effort to be neater and more organised and have been progressively trying to weed through my various mounts of sentimental possessions, knick-knacks and i'm-sure-this-will-be-useful-in-future-so-i'll-keep-them-just-in-case items.. But this I am not going to undo 26 years of bad-habits overnight. He has said that his aim is to get my room into a good shape by the end of 2009. So clearly he knows the mountain is steep, and the journey is arduous... and I am thankful he is realistic and patient.

I only hope his patience and love will last so I will always be able to pout at him and ask: "Tu m'aimes?" and feel his answer in my heart, no matter what mischievous faces he pulls or cheeky answers he gives.

Wearing pearls

A couple of weeks ago I decided that I need an expanded work wardrobe now that I'm more client-facing, and a classier, more sophisticated look to counterbalance my petite build and relatively youthful looks and create a more senior, and sobre impression.

A combination of wanting a elegant, a deepening antipathy towards ironing, my sudden realisation that my arms aren't *that* fat after all, and the Boy being mega supportive of me wearing skirts/dressed led me to buy a very classic, round neck, sleeveless, form-fitting Little Black Dress. I was actually very keen on a cute, semi-playful, arty and shapeless shift dress with a tulip-skirt hem. But the Boy convinced me to take the form-fitting one since he argued convincingly (and he can clearly be very convincing since he convinced me to go out with him!) that it was great value for money since it was elegant and perfect for work when paired with a jacket, yet sexy and spot on for a night out.

And so I bought it, since it was true that this LBD had more mileage than the shift dress, and I would finally have a piece that would allow me to wear the pearl necklace that my Mom gave me (and the numerous other strings of pearls that she passed to me and the one the Boy gave me), since I've always loved pearls and my necklace, but never had the clothes nor the occasion to wear them.

I road-tested the look on Wednesday at my cousin's graduation, which was a formal event. And today, given I had a client meeting and was in a rush and had no other ironed clothes, I wore my LBD and pearls to work before I had a chance to get scared and chicken out. (My image at work is that of a happy, random, and haphazard child-like free-spirit rather than a real banker, so this would be a 180 degree turnaround)

And the responses were great, everyone thought I looked super elegant and a knock-out and like I didn't belong in the office, more like I was going to fancy restaurant or club. Most of the people who commented on my look asked me if I was going out for dinner. The reality, as one girl pointed out, is that my look could be corporate.. but it was the super elegant (usually very much more senior) Chanel look (but with Joseph rather than Chanel). But I guess people just aren't used to seeing me in that light, and besides, we're very casual in the office, which is nice since I'm lazy and it facilitates my tumble-out-of-bed-and-pull-on-the-first-sweater lifestyle. And yet, it's also nice to be really sharply power-dressed. My hope is that I'll have more client meetings (and start actually saying more things), which would give me a reason to dress up and justify me investing in nice clothes! :)

his other side

This weekend, one of the Boy's friends from uni visited from the States, so on Saturday, the Boy and I met him and one of the Boy's good friend from the next team for drinks. When the two friends and I were alone, they told me that they're surprised at how different/nice the Boy is with me.

And the US friend said that yes, he was actually very very impressed.

I was like: huh, how so?

They said that the Boy is generally pretty aggressive with them and like "Shut th f*ck up" etc. But he's really protective of me and pays close attention to me/ takes care of me.

Which made me feel all warm and special. But of course, I'm a girl and they are boys, so it only makes sense that he is nice to me. Nonetheless, their comments still made me very happy. It's great that he can be both hard and soft - hard to the rest of the world, and soft with me - that is, he is strong, but he uses the strength for me, to protect me, rather than against me.

Although, having said all that, the Boy is a bit belligerent/defensive when we have disagreements, which is a bit of a shock to the system actually.